Skip to main content

The Story of "You" (Louis Toliver Jr-Swartz, LA)


“What about us?” I said as I was leaving
I’ve spent all this time right by your side
And this is how you repay me? This?
Yes, I’m pissed. Yes, I’m fucking pissed.
I’m not going to keep saying I’m sorry
Not to a piece of shit like you, no way!
You. You. “You” is all I hear out of you

And the thought that I gave so much time…
The thought that I built a life around you…
What about us? Huh? What about us?
Lying, cheating, stealing, hating, fighting,
Hugging, kissing, sighing, loving, fucking…
Ahhh! I hate you! I hate you! I love you!

Was I always in this alone? When did you leave ?
Where did your heart go? Mine was here.
I’m so embarrassed. I’m so confused. I am…
Who I am? Who am I… without you?  I’m lost
My life gone down the drain. A black hole.

A black hole created by an asshole. That’s you.
Yep. The asshole. I don’t know what to say now.
I could stand here in silence. Should I? Hell no.
Well, I’ll  just stand here and think. Think…

About the multiple ways to say “goodbye, jerk”
Or about the multiple ways I can leave you
My stomach turns at the sight of a dead end

And that’s what you are…a dead end. You!
Clearly, you can tell I’m finding a new path

I’m no longer in the cast of the “Story of You”

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

This Little White Boy Who Wanted Some Nigger In Him (James Leland Ludeau III - Lafayette, LA)

Grew up on a plantation
Removed
Secluded from the world
I knew classes but didn’t understand race
Because what raced through my veins wasn’t something of which I could ever speak
My father could fuck the slave girls
But I couldn’t touch the men
It filled me with resentment
Fueled my resentment with lust
Until it was too much to take
It was a small contained community
White as the cotton in the fields
Only dark around the edges where the black men lived
Ploughing the fields
I’d imagine them ploughing me
Sinewy
Glistening with sweat as the sun bathed their shoulders
The sweat running down until it pooled around the waistband of their thin cotton pants
Their skin
Black, almost indigo, like night
Some like coffee with milk in it
Cafe au lait
I could smell their musk
Watched as their muscly bodies worked
I yearned
Burned
This little white boy who wanted some nigger in him
To fall beneath the weight of one
As he heaved
As he forced his throbbing cock into my crevice
I longed for even the pa…

God Will Cry (Louis Toliver Jr - Swartz, LA)

This is your soul trying to connect to you for last the time. We have come to the final crossroad in our life. This is the end. These are our last earthly breaths.
From this abuse of yourself, we will both die. You will be a rotting corpse. I will fade away into Darkness. People may mourn your death, at first, but you will be forgotten, while I am left here molested by the hands of Hell.
God will cry, “My child didn’t fulfill her purpose.”
I’m begging you; don’t do this. It has been a slow ride, a slow descent to suicide.

"I Love You" is Enough (Louis Toliver Jr)

Please don’t stress I see what you do all year Everyday you show me Through your actions How much you care for me But please don’t stress It’s not money or possessions That make me give my life to you It’s the moments that are small When people don’t care to look That you show your love most So don’t stress to demonstrate What you already know you do Just say “I love you” and… My underwear will come off for you