As I was in London, I stood in the St. Pancras
International Train Station, met with the concrete creation of my abstract thoughts. For 28
years, I stood in contemplation, in something in my mind that was just like
this station. Many trains, many
destinations, many distractions, yet only one train led back to you. I had been
so distracted by the cost of my train ticket and all the thousands of people
lost, like me, that I almost missed the love train. I almost lost you. I almost gave up on us. At "that" time, I
was missing the love inside me that could fuel me to act. But I have it now, so I
finally decided to get outside of my head and contact you. When I called and told
you I was coming back to you, all that I loved, I could hear the excitement,
still, in your voice. So, I had to act for us. The “other” trains I traveled had
taken me away from you for good purpose but had also brought me back with that same
purpose. I was ready to leave the station and get on the love train, to you.
I meant it not this way but the tears just flow and my makeup smearing all the more, leaving behind that familiar filthy residue. I may have begun to drive myself away, dragging you down as well. But it's done, I've flipped the switch and now it's dark once more. How painful is the music to my ears, I can't stand to be alone in it, yet here I am again. I pray you fly back and safely and warmly to me, though I fear I've dug the grave too deeply. As the dirt shifts within my soul, I choke on those loving words I'd meant for you. All the fragments of light I see becoming smaller and I wish to be near you in your embrace that might make me feel the warmth I'm missing. And in reality, I doubt I'd breathe another breath without you. So come hither and quickly soothe my dying heart, you are the only cure I know. I cry and cry again, come hither to heal and love me. Come hither and help me dry my tears.
Comments
Post a Comment