My Sympathy (Because You Need It) (Ted Richard-Church Point, LA)

So now your son is dead

And you want to grieve for his untimely death.

Please accept my condolences.

You decided to come to the funeral home and expected to be welcomed with open arms.

But you were sadly mistaken!

You seem to have forgotten that your son was MY husband.

And that you disowned him years ago.

For so many years he felt the hatred that spewed forth from your venomous mouth,

And when he finally broke free,

You decided to blame ME for everything that was WRONG with him.

Well, let me tell you something!!

There was not a DAMN thing WRONG with my husband.

Yes, there were little things that kinda irritated me, but I’m sure that feeling was mutual.

But the very thing that you thought was WRONG with your son

Is the VERY thing that I LOVED about him.

Your son taught me about pride, honor, friendship and love;

The kind of things he NEVER got from you.

But he NEVER blamed you.

You see, it’s hard to blame ignorance on the ignorant.

But my husband DID learn a lot from you, and he passed that on to me.

He learned about all the man that he NEVER wanted to be.

He learned that pride comes from within, while you taught him to conform.

He learned that honor is something that is earned, not something you get just because you’re older.

He learned that friendship is about trust, and not about the need for acceptance.

And he learned that love is something you should give freely,

Instead of the hatred that he learned from YOU!

So YES, my husband did learn a lot from you

And I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart.

Because had my husband NOT learned from you the things he DID NOT want to be,

He would never have turned into the man that he truly became.

My friend

My partner

My lover

My husband.

The man who loved me unconditionally, even when you could never do the same for him.

So I’ll offer to you the graces that you would never have given to your son.

I’ll allow you to grieve in your own way and in your own space.

But tread very lightly on these hallowed floors

Because your son and his loved ones (that doesn’t include you) don’t want you here,

And neither do I.

So don’t think that you can come here and expect any sort of sympathy from anyone in this room.

Because through your own ignorance, you can’t even realize that you don’t belong here.

But if you really want to stay, I’ll be gracious.

Just sit in that chair way in the back of the room

And you can listen to all of the great things that people have to say about your son.

And pretend, in your warped mind, that you were somehow inspirational to him.

If that’s what you wanna do, then fine.

But I’d better not hear you opening your mouth

Complaining about how all of your son’s “problems” were my fault

Or how you could have raised him “better”.

Because you’re too stupid to realize that the son you raised and then threw out

Turned out to be more than you could ever hope to be.

So you can just sit there in that chair and be quiet

Or you can leave now.

Either way, your son, MY HUSBAND will be just fine!!

Oh and one more thing, your son, MY HUSBAND, gave me the courage to speak my mind!

And I just did !!!